Lean In : In a nutshell

Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In is the perfect motivation pill for every women professional . Often women have struggle in justifying their opinion professionally and publicly .

Lean In was Sheryl’s contribution towards empowering and opening up candidly about this from all dimensions . Let’s not just start speaking about it but also do something about it .

The Leadership Ambition Gap

1. This chapter voices out why very few women make it to executive leadership ,emphasising the need for better portrayal of working women than ‘I don’t Know How She Does it’ .
2. Unspoken “mother’s guilt” (new moms returning to workspace) and how it sets back career progress in highly motivated professionals.
3. Sheryl Says :“Social scientists have observed that when members of a group are made aware of a negative stereotype , they are more likely to perform according to that stereotype. For example, stereotypically, boys are better at math and science than girls. When girls are reminded of their gender before a math or science test, even by something as simple as checking off an M or F box at the top of the test, they perform worse”

Sit at The Table

1. Self-doubt and abiding by gender stereotypes can yourself question your ability to get things done
2. Sheryl Says : “One tactic I’ve learned is to fake it til you feel it.’ Research backs up this ‘fake it til you feel it’ strategy. One study found that when people assumed a high-power pose for just two minutes their dominance hormones (testosterone) went up and their stress hormone levels (cortisol) went down. As a result, they felt more powerful and in charge and showed a greater tolerance for risk. A simple change in posture led to a significant change in attitude.”
3. Opportunities are often created jumping into initiatives and being candid about your expectations -studies show women are more hesitant than men in doing so at work places.

Success and likeability

1. For ages Men have been stereotyped as providers and women as caregivers and hence the society and our work places have struggles in “Liking”successful women as per standard societal norms and often described “Bossy” “Dominating” and “Disliked” and men with the same traits are considered “Accomplished” “Driven” and “Liked”.
2. “When a man helps a colleague, the recipient feels indebted to him and is highly likely to return the favour. But when a woman helps out, the feeling of indebtedness is weaker. She’s communal right? She wants to help others. Professor Flynn calls this the ‘gender discount’ problem and it means women are paying a professional penalty for their presumed desire to be communal.”
3. Cost of speaking your mind often not rewarding .

It’s a Jungle Gym Not a Ladder

1. Career progression is not a ladder ,Ladders are limiting — people can move up or down, on or off. Jungle gyms offer more creative exploration. There’s only one way to get to the top of a ladder, but there are many ways to get to the top of a jungle gym
2. Growth Mindset : “Women need to shift from thinking ‘I’m not ready to do that’ to thinking ‘I want to do that — and I’ll learn by doing it ’’

Are You My Mentor?

1. Mentees should avoid complaining excessively to a mentor. Using a mentor’s time to validate feelings may help psychologically, but it’s better to focus on specific problems with real solutions. Most people in a position to mentor are quite adept at problem-solving
2. Personal connections lead to assignments and promotions so it needs to be OK for men and women to spend informal time together the same way men can . Yes your mentor need not be in the same gender as you are.

Don’t Leave Before You Leave

1. Men who work 60+ hours a week have wives who are 112% more likely to quit work than women whose husbands work 50 hours or less/week
2. Lean in: “The time to scale back is when a break is needed or when a child arrives not before, and certainly not years in advance. The months and years leading up to having children are not the time to lean back , but the critical time to lean in.”
3. A women’s family planning shouldn’t be a factor affecting her hiring decision and at the same time women shouldn’t decline themselves until you are facing a circumstance and not anticipating the happening in advance.

Make Your Partner a Real Partner

1. “I truly believe that the single biggest career decision that a woman makes is whether she will have a life partner and who that partner is ’’
2. If women want to succeed more at work and if men want to succeed more at home, these expectations have to be challenged. ‘It’s not about biology, but about conscientiousness.’’
3. “Anyone who wants her mate to be a true partner must treat him as an equal — and equally capable — partner. And if that’s not reason enough, bear in mind that a study found that wives who engage in gate-keeping behaviours do five more hours of family work per week than wives who take a more collaborative approach.”
4. When husbands do more housework, wives are less depressed, marital conflicts decrease and satisfaction rise, the risk of divorce reduces by half when a woman earns half the income and a husband does half the housework

The Myth of Doing It All

1. No one has it all — just embrace it and . Prioritise your mental ,physical and emotional wellness
2. Practise makes you perfect ,so you may not get it right the first time — but eventually you will .Women have a hard time conceiving this thought.

Let’s Start Talking About It

• “Research suggests that once a woman achieves success, particularly in a gender-biased context, her capacity to see gender discrimination is reduced.”
• “There is hope that this is attitude is changing. A recent survey found that ‘high-potential women’ working in business want to ‘pay it forward’ and 73% have reached out to other women to help them develop their talents. Almost all of the women I have encountered professional have gone out of their way to be helpful.”
• The more women help one another, the more we help ourselves. Acting like a coalition truly does produce results. In 2004, four female executives at Merrill Lynch started having lunch together once a month. They shared their accomplishments and frustrations. They brainstormed about business. After the lunches they would go back to their offices and tout one another’s achievements. They couldn’t brag about themselves, but they could easily do it for their colleagues. Their careers flourished and each rose up the ranks to reach managing director and executive officer levels. The queen been was banished and the hive became stronger.”